Being John Malkovich (1999)

THE FOLLOWING REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Thank you, yet again, to Jake Barbieri for requesting this review! You have set a record! Being John Malkovich (1999) is, without any doubt, one of the most bizarre films I have ever seen. Released in 1999, and starring John Cusack, Catherine Keener, Cameron Diaz, and, yes, John Malkovich, the film was directed by Spike Jonze and written by Charlie Kaufman. I saw this film years back and wasn't a big fan of it because I didn't get it. I decided to watch it again and thought, "I'm older, I'm a film student, and I'm more educated, maybe I'll like it more this time around." But after finishing it, no. I still don't get it. There are things that I can appreciate about this film, though. The cinematography and the writing is excellent. Kaufman is a real genius for being able to come up with such an idea for a film.

Anyway, the film tells the story of New York City resident Craig Schwartz (Cusack), an unemployed, aspiring puppeteer who has a workshop of puppets down in the basement. He is married to Lotte (Diaz), a pet shop worker who has numerous pets, including a parrot and chimpanzee, in their apartment. The two love each other, but Craig clearly isn't happy in the marriage. The first thing I have to say is wow! Comparing Diaz's looks here to her debut film, The Mask (1994) is insane. Diaz is a beautiful actress and often plays beautiful characters, but she obviously isn't supposed to be attractive here. The stylists do an amazing job with making her look undesirable.

After several failed attempts at puppeteering, Craig decides to find a regular job for the time being. He gets a job as a file clerk on the 7 1/2th floor of the Mertin-Flemmer building, working for the very elderly and eccentric Dr. Lester (Orson Bean). Yes, earlier I said the 7 1/2th floor. The building has a floor between the 7th and 8th floor. On this floor, the ceilings are very low, so low that people actually have to hunch over to walk. The floor was built for the original owner, Captain Mertin's, dwarf wife. Yes, this is actually in the film. Craig meets, and becomes infatuated with, a coworker, Maxine (Keener). She is very obviously not into him. One day, after moving a cabinet when some papers fell down behind it, Craig finds a mysterious door that, when entered, leads to a portal in which a person can see the world through the eyes of actor John Malkovich (Malkovich, DUH). After being inside it for 15 minutes the person is ejected from the portal into a ditch by the New Jersey Turnpike. He tells Maxine about the experience and the two decide to start a business in which they charge people $200 for time in the portal. When Lotte tries it out, however, she becomes obsessed with the portal, as it awakens her transgender side. Maxine decides to have an affair with Malkovich while Lotte is in the portal. Lotte and Maxine begin to fall in love. This angers Craig, so he ties up Lotte and goes into Malkovich while Maxine is having sex with Malkovich. Craig, using his puppeteer skills, discovers that he is able to control Malkovich. This causes Malkovich to become massively paranoid, eventually discovering the portal. When Malkovich tries it himself, he goes into another world that is just...well...like an acid trip gone horribly wrong.

This is where the film gets even stranger. Maxine discovers that Craig is inside Malkovich and she becomes very attracted to how Craig can control him. Craig also finds a way to stay inside the portal indefinitely. Unbeknownst to Craig, Lotte has escaped and has sought out the help of Dr. Lester. Lester is actually Captain Mertin who is well aware of the portal and uses it to live forever by jumping from body to body, whoever the host may be. While Craig remains inside Malkovich, he marries Maxine and makes Malkovich a world renowned puppeteer. Unfortunately, the time is running out for Lester to go into the portal and Craig is still refusing to leave. What will happen next?

Being John Malkovich is a bizarre film on so many levels. The 7 1/2th floor is probably the least weird thing there is in this film. I commend Kaufman on coming up with such a unique idea, I really do. I could never have come up with this. However, the film doesn't quite work for me. I honestly liked a lot of parts of the film, however. Charlie Sheen makes a cameo in the film and his cameo is absolutely hilarious. Malkovich, after becoming paranoid, consults Sheen, his friend, about what to do. Sheen isn't particularly helpful and is actually jealous of the situation he's in, with Maxine repeatedly referring to him as Lotte. He later appears at the end, which takes place years later, where he has a very obviously fake balding cap. Can't believe he still doesn't look like that, even though its been much longer. The writing is also delightful. With hilariously awkward dialogue to ridiculous characters, this film deserved its nomination for Best Screenplay. However, I still wasn't the biggest fan. I still liked it, but not as much as others did. My biggest problem is not understanding it. Maybe after an extensive analysis of the film, maybe I'll understand it. But for now, I just don't get it. I rate it GOOD on the scale.